Therapuetic approach
Mindfulness &
self compassion
“The curious paradox is that when I accept myself, just as I am, then I can change”
– Carl Rogers
In sessions, we work together to track the physical sensations associated with emotion and nervous system states, not to make them go away, but to give them more space to be known, felt, understood, and valued.
A mindful and compassionate relationship with ourselves allows us to drop the struggle of self-judgement and emotional avoidance (hello old friends: numbing, dissociation, shame and guilt, people pleasing, blame, and anxiety!). This allows our emotions to take their intended role as valued messengers, and our body as a site of wellbeing and connection.
My work is informed by Kristin Neff’s Mindful Self-Compassion (MSC) program, as well as Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) and Accelerated Experiential Dynamic Psychotherapy (AEDP), as well as my own ongoing, imperfect mindfulness practice
“Compassion is knowing our darkness well enough that we can sit in the dark with others. It never is a relationship between the wounded and the healed. It is a relationship between equals.”
– Pema Chodron
Safety happens in relationship – I can’t ask for your authenticity without offering you the same.
You can expect me to show up as a real human in a real (albeit particular, and boundaried) relationship, rather than an emotionally removed, “blank slate”. This means that I am willing to use self-disclosure when it is in your best interest, to be honest when I don’t know something, and to check in when I’m worried I’ve been misattuned. When I am genuinely moved or impacted by the things you say and the work we do together, I’m going to let you know. When there are ruptures in the relationship, repairing this can be some of the most powerful work that we do.
I am always trying to disrupt the hierarchical therapist-client dynamic. My approach is not of the well treating the sick, but a process of walking alongside as flawed equals. I centre self-determination, consent, choice, negotiation and honesty.
This relational approach to therapy is informed by Feminist Therapy, Accelerated Experiential Dynamic Psychotherapy (AEDP), Relational and Person-Centred therapies.
Real relationship
“Justice is what love looks like in public, just like tenderness is what love feels like in private”
– Cornel West
In my practice I work with clients to resist the individualizing and pathologizing history of psychotherapy. So much of what we problematize in therapy can be better understood as forms of coping with oppression. For example, we cannot heal our feelings of shame without talking about the societal shaming of groups of people as a form of social control. My ethic of therapy is grounded in:
Queer Theory means challenging binaries of normal and deviant, and questioning assumptions about identity, power, social norms, and practices. It allows us to envision audacious futures of freedom and joy.
Intersectional Feminism says no-one is free until everyone is free. It explicitly incorporates factors like race, gender, ability, class, sexuality and gender identity into its liberatory project and embraces collective power and solidarity across difference.
Anti-Oppressive Practice centres social change as part of the therapeutic ethic. If our struggles are systemic, then individual talk therapy alone will never be the solution. This is why I dedicate time to advocacy outside of my work, support clients to find ways to resist in their lives, and offer sliding scale spots to activists.